[don’t read this]

I haven’t wanted to post because I have nothing positive to say. It’s been a really stressful, stupid, terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad week. One of those weeks where all the little things build up and pile on at once.
  • The roomba broke, again. This is the 4th time in 6 months. It’s also making that grinding noise that it made last time the gearbox crapped out on us, so I suspect the 5th breakdown is rapidly approaching. I’m pretty sure we’re going to trade it in for a Neato, because this is ridiculous.
  • I ordered a Modern Vapor starter kit on 12/23/11. I chose MV because they were the most affordable, and also, pretty batteries. It arrived on 12/28/11. I really like it. I went through about 3 or 4 days of withdrawing from all those awful chemicals they put in cigarettes, but it wasn’t that bad because I was still getting nicotine — I was just withdrawing from the additives. Plus, since it’s water vapor and not smoke, my lungs were clearing up and I was feeling physically better. Then on 1/8/11, I put one of the pre-filled cartridges shipped with my order onto the atomizer, and the cartridge started leaking this oily, stinging fluid everywhere. It really hurts on your lips. The battery stopped working. I e-mailed MV, and they said it was the atomizer and sent me a new one, which arrived today (also, it wasn’t the atomizer; their leaking cartridge broke the battery and it’s still not working). So I’ve been going through a bit of nicotine withdrawal this week, which sucks because my main tool for nicotine withdrawal is Excedrin Migraine which is . . .
  • Under a voluntary recall, and the bottle I have is one of the affected batches. So I need to return that bottle a.s.a.p., and I can’t be using them to deal with my headaches. On top of this,
  • I’m dealing with a medical issue common to women in my age group, but unprecedented to me, and it’s pretty damn uncomfortable. I don’t like it. No, I’m not pregnant. I’ve been fixed, remember?
  • To add to these existing personal stresses, there’s the usual bill-juggling, grocery-shopping sans car, managing savings stresses. Then, on top of that,
  • Kidling is upset/ stressed out/ crying a lot because he can’t see his cousin. Not my decision or choice, but there’s nothing I can do to resolve it, either. So I’m trying to comfort Kidling without making his uncle seem like a bad guy for restricting access because he’s (uncle) is going through a cruddy time, emotionally, and long story short, Kidling thinks I’m preventing him from seeing his cousin and is mad at me.
  • I’m trying to figure out how we’re going to get to Kidling’s b-day party without a car. We’re going to buy a car in April, but until then, we’re sans car, and I feel like a shithead every time I call someone to ask for a ride, but at the same time, it’s really cold and rainy out.
So, obviously, I’m more than a little tense lately; very on edge and scream-y. My mom used to say, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all,” and lately I just feel stressed and angry and snappish. So I haven’t been updating my blog or calling people at all, because (quite frankly) I’m such a pain in the ass that I want to avoid me. Oh, and the x-box is breaking down. Yay! The tray is all stuck and annoying, and it’s no longer under warranty, so we’d have to pay an arm and a leg to get it repaired, but we can’t afford a newer one, either. So in the meantime, we have an x-box that makes this really super-loud humming sound, audibly clicks when a game or movie is in it, and doesn’t open it’s tray 90% of the time. I don’t know what the crap is wrong with it, but I can’t even play video games to relax. I’ve also decided to cancel my birthday party, mainly because I don’t want to deal with figuring out the car/ finances to do it, but I can’t help feeling a little sad that I won’t be seeing my friends on my birthday.I feel like the winter blues finally caught up to me. I’d been doing a fairly successful job throughout December of pushing them off, but man they’ve slammed me hard. I just feel like crying or screaming pretty much all the time.


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